dear every tech support company

I spent the better part of the last few days trying to buy a bus pass. More specifically trying to set up a bus pass account for a brand new system and at the end of about 36 hours I have not been successful. Jockeyed between two companies using a system that is clearly not user tested and being given some answers that are clearly incorrect I’m am quite literally so tense I don’t want to deal with this anymore but I need that damned bus pass. Edit – in the almost 6 weeks since I wrote this I am not completely done with this set up!

Some handy suggestions to create less actual fury for your users.

1.       Especially if a system is new write and post in a logical place clear instructions and include information for how to proceed if something is different from the way it has worked in the past. In this case the former company would take direct withdrawals from your bank account. New company only accepts Visa or MasterCard debit. Apparently there was a paper form to deal with those of us without the acceptable debit card. It took 3 phone calls, 1 missed, and several threads of twitter interaction before anyone mentioned this to me. And even then I had to ask for the link.

 

2.       Do not tell people their browser is incompatible. If you are dealing with consumers and not business people there are at least four browsers you should be set up for. They are Google Chrome, Safari, Firefox and Internet Explorer.  A quick Google search puts these browsers in top 5 lists consistently. Sure every list has them ranked in different order but they are always there.

3.       As much as I hate scripts sometimes the information from them is needed for your staff. I get it. Phone centre jobs suck and you usually do not get the best of the crop for those positions but please arm these people with information. By the time most of us get to contacting a company we’re angry and frustrated. We understand that the voice on the phone is not the reason we’re angry but right or wrong they’re who we are dealing with. We need accurate, clear information and explanations. What I’ve heard for the past few days is ‘incompatible’ and ‘you can do that on our website’. Turns out there’s an issue with your website so I can’t. Which is why I’m calling.

4.       Deal with people. I spent quite a bit of time on twitter yesterday. I find it incredibly useful for getting companies to listen to you. I got a response right away from the company no longer offering the service. Most of what they answered was platitudes but at least they were paying attention to me. It took the new company, the one I’m trying to pay about 15 interactions before they finally piped in. Ditto read your messages before responding. I had so many bots answer things I didn’t ask yesterday. I am a bit of a weirdo but I always include my browser and OS information. If your first response is asking me these questions it is completely clear that you did not give my message more than a cursory glance.

5.       Do user acceptance testing. By this I mean have people who do not know what your website is supposed to do test it. When you do your own testing you test with a bias.

If your website is designed to take money please make it so people can pay you. There are so many testing shopping cart apps out there. Do not, to use a very overused phrase, reinvent the wheel. The wheel, so simple in its form, works. 

Please, please, please stop telling users they are at fault. They are not. They may not have done things the way you set them up but users act on a series of learned reactions.They learn each time they users systems and apps and that knowledge is compounded over time. For those of us in Gen X we've been through several radical OS changes and had to adapt to all of them. I personally find all this intuitive 'helping' that software and apps do these days completely counter-intuitive because I learned systems when everything was done by me. Yes I've had to adapt but sometimes my instinct isn't your instinct. And for Millennials and Gen Xed they are even more tech savvy than anyone. They don't need things dumbed down. Whatever generation we are; we've contacted you for help. Help us.

does size matter

Headlines announce Kmart decides to stop using the term ‘plus’ and instead brand these items ‘fabulous sized’. Part of me rolls my eyes and another part of me wonders if this is the disruption that the industry needs.

For years I hovered in the purgatory that exists between ‘regular’ size 14 and ‘plus’ size 16. I didn’t fit in either. There was a short period when I fit into the no longer Additionelle size 12. It was great. I shopped at one store and everything was always on sale because no one really fit that size. Before that it was flip-flopping the aisles at Cotton Ginny where a plus size 12 fit better than a regular size 14 but cost between $5 and $8 more because they used more fabric – no word of a lie this was their rationale for charging larger women more for their clothes. Instead of being honest and admitting they had a captive market with almost no alternative and they could get away with it.

Fortunately the industry keeps adjusting sizes and adding “00” – what used to be size 2. So now I can, mostly, comfortably buy clothes, provided ‘that bitch’ doesn’t get there first and clear out the one size 12/14 that the store has. Although admittedly I most buy knit wear anymore so I have a little give to work with.

I’m not a size warrior. I really don’t care what the label says I just want the clothes to fit properly and be flattering. But what I have never understood is that we know there is a market out there for larger sizes and yet retailers continue to leave money on the table pretending this market doesn’t exist. 

Or perhaps even worse, they shutter this group into online shopping, keeping those larger bodies out of the shops to fit some sort of aesthetic that really shouldn’t exist. And frankly, if you asked most people, nobody is that offended by. Yes I know there are major fat shaming issues out there. I’ve seen it. I’ve heard it. I’ve had it done to me. What I’m hoping to address in this post isn’t this subject. It’s the completely and utter lack of interest in a market that makes money.

Let’s back up for a minute. Buying your clothes off the rack is a relatively new idea. Up until midway through the last century you picked your dresses from a model or a drawing, you were measured and your garment made. If you couldn't afford that you often made your own garments. For centuries prêt a porter was limited to unfitted garments, night clothes and gloves. Simply; your clothes were made to fit you. When ready to wear became prevalent the idea of sizing came into play and suddenly you needed to fit your clothes. But ask any well dressed person and the secret they’ll keep is tailoring. There is no such thing as standard sizing and sizes are designed to make the most efficient use of fabric, not to fit an actual body.

There’s always the fact that conspicuous consumption, the concept of disposable clothing is also fairly new. And it’s an entirely different subject. Not so long ago you had a few well made garments that were expected to last for years. When your good dress wore out a bit you kept wearing it but it was downgraded to day dress or house frock. There is a massive environmental issue surrounding disposal of seldom worn garments and the lack of recycling of textiles but again I’m trying to focus here.

I have a range of friends in a range of sizes. And we all struggle to find pants that fit. Many of my self-proclaimed ‘fat’ friends have taught themselves to sew. Something I also do. However even the pattern industry doesn’t go past a size 24. There, it seems, is no winning.

Does Kmart have the right idea? I have no idea. Kmart isn’t a Canadian entity anymore so my first hand experience won’t be happening any time soon. Does my decision to try to shop in size inclusive establishments make a difference? I hope so, but so many of those continue to only cater to the larger size market via online, so I can’t shop with these friends. Does size designation really making shopping easier or does it just isolate us by labeling us in a negative way?

Am I really going to go out and ask if a shop carries ‘fabulous’ sizes? Or am I just going to ask; why can’t we just say size and get on with it?

malarkey - not really a post

Yes, I know I've been out of touch for awhile. I'll explain at some point, but let's just say I've been playing curve ball with life for a bit and channeling my creativity into another favoured activity - sewing clothes.

BUT, I read this the other day and I say HOOEY. 

First off Canadians have not been slow to adopt online grocery shopping, Canadians had almost no options when it came to online grocery shopping.

Second off, other than Grocery Gateway, which I tried to use once, but because, as we all know, I'm so well trained by Loblaws, I wasn't as familiar with whoever Grocery Gateway was at the time, I didn't find products I knew and just gave up, when online grocery shopping finally started to hit, you had to pick up your groceries. In my area the only Loblaws store participating in the pilot isn't really accessible by TTC - so clearly transit users weren't a target market. The other player is Walmart. No thanks.

As a non car owner, I'd really enjoy the option to have delivery.  Truthfully I'd probably do a large shop every month or so and fill in the rest. The idea suggested here, in this seemingly Walmart sponsored editorial, that people don't want to wait for delivery, I challenge too. I've used grocery delivery before (I had to go to the store to shop and then wait), and because it was cheaper than taking a cab home (!), I didn't find it that cumbersome.

Here's an idea marketers. Consider the suburbs a completely different market. I think you'll see dense urban centres consume in a much different way.

Yes, I should probably work for Loblaws, but I don't want to commute the suburbs.

on pulling out - not really a post

This amazing account, is not the last days of disco. In fact it completely lacks any hints of nostalgia. And rightly so.

colour me zen?

Someone in my social media circle questioned the current infatuation with ‘adult’ colouring books – not ‘adult’ as in people without their clothes, but 'adult' as in more sophisticated drawings than rounded cartoon bears and their cheerful companions. It’s a fad that seemed to take over the Christmas shopping list quite quickly. I bought one for a kid straddling that space between childhood and tween-dom - hoping it would somehow fit this awkward age, another friend received one from her friend. The art supply store had an entire shelf devoted to these bound books filled with intricate designs, marketed as meditative. I’m not certain I fully understand the meditative angle, but based on the discussion I ended up having buying that particular present, I guess other people question this marketing angle too.

Basically the discussion had in line was whether or not artsy people needed a colouring book. I, and apparently this man’s wife too, argued that for people who wanted to feel creative but maybe didn’t know how to go about it, for them, this was a place to filter that energy and have an outlet. I mean isn’t this the 2010’s version of the velvet poster art we all did back in the *cough day?!

Being a little crafty already I feel like I have an outlet for the part of me that occasionally wants to make something. I sew, I tinker with beads, I dance, I write this blog, I can draw/paint reasonably but honestly that doesn’t come so naturally. In a weird twist the first time I noticed an ‘adult’ colouring book it came from the McCall’s pattern company – they’d released a  small collection of drawings of a this year’s popular pattern offerings. I downloaded and printed them but in the end, the creative process for me is finding fabric and then figuring out what I might make of it. Because in the end you can imagine whatever you want but if you can’t find the fabric you’re after it’s all moot. And I find my method more satisfying, although time consuming because all the ‘good’ fabric stores are across the city. Although I think I lost the point here, the point was, the colouring book concept is interesting, but maybe not so much for me – so far.

This modern world demands a lot of a person - rather demands that you appear a certain way. Facebook demands the appearance of meaningful interactions with friends and the presentation of a specific life. Twitter demands short, astute, and insightful appearing observations and quips. Pinterest demands the appearance of organized, glamorous and well fed aspirations. Instagram demands all of the above in pictures -I think, honestly I, thus far, have opted out of Instagram, Tinder, Snapchat and whatever might be trending this week, because I can barely keep up the facade of Facebook, Twitter and Pinterest. Although if I’m being honest I use Facebook to promote my agenda of the absurd, and admit that I spend a lot of my life being a dork. I find Twitter most useful as an outlet as a consumer, a conduit for information I find interesting and very occasionally for being part of a trending topic. But the idea that all of this creative energy spent on keeping up appearances, one wonders if a simpler outlet might be the answer everyone was seeking. Perhaps this idea of a meditative activity does make sense?

Having been raised by wolves, well artistic wolves, I have spent a life around arts, less so now, but it’s still part of my life. When I wanted a particular Christmas tree decoration and couldn’t find what I wanted commercially, I went to Pinterest, stole an idea and whipped up a few myself, because I could. So in that same breath, does the idea of sitting down with a preset drawing and filling in the spaces with colour appeal? Well no, but that's me.

To finish where I started, what is the fascination with these colouring books? I don’t know. I make assumptions that it fulfills a need for those seeking a creative outlet but not certain where to find it. Am I right? Don’t know. But I am wondering if McCall’s has a spring edition of theirs.

P.S. I think it’s absolutely charming that my spellcheck doesn’t recognize Facebook as a word - or spellcheck for that matter.

#sidebar - amazingly odd marketing - this week - uber and your local pet rescue

At first blush this seems cute. Who doesn't love a squirmy little fluff ball? Well there are people but they're wrong.

Full disclosure, I'm a cat person. In fact there's a little grey (rescue) cat waiting for a pat on the head as I type this.

BUT.

Cat's aren't overly fond of car rides or places they're unfamiliar with - if you've ever taken a ride with a wailing cat you'll know this. Uber is about to come into a court with the city and various existing cab companies. Clearly this is a stunt. And, again, at first blush, getting pets adopted is the ultimate goal but is this the best way to do this?

I was among those who lauded the decision to stop pet store sales of any animals that are not rescue animals. Yes it means that you have to seek out pets for adoption, but it stops those impulse pet purchases which might have arguably been abandoned or required rescuing at some point. But I am really going out on a limb - having no data to back me up.

So will I be ordering a cat to cuddle? No. I already have one, no matter how much he objects.

still missing the point - not really a post

Seriously, you can't make this stuff up.

I went looking for some info on putting the long form census back in place and found this. So maybe it we had the census Target might have gotten it. But I doubt it.