#sidebar - amazingly odd marketing - this week - uber and your local pet rescue

At first blush this seems cute. Who doesn't love a squirmy little fluff ball? Well there are people but they're wrong.

Full disclosure, I'm a cat person. In fact there's a little grey (rescue) cat waiting for a pat on the head as I type this.

BUT.

Cat's aren't overly fond of car rides or places they're unfamiliar with - if you've ever taken a ride with a wailing cat you'll know this. Uber is about to come into a court with the city and various existing cab companies. Clearly this is a stunt. And, again, at first blush, getting pets adopted is the ultimate goal but is this the best way to do this?

I was among those who lauded the decision to stop pet store sales of any animals that are not rescue animals. Yes it means that you have to seek out pets for adoption, but it stops those impulse pet purchases which might have arguably been abandoned or required rescuing at some point. But I am really going out on a limb - having no data to back me up.

So will I be ordering a cat to cuddle? No. I already have one, no matter how much he objects.

still missing the point - not really a post

Seriously, you can't make this stuff up.

I went looking for some info on putting the long form census back in place and found this. So maybe it we had the census Target might have gotten it. But I doubt it.

hardly surprising - not really a post

Shocking to almost no consumer, it turns out consumers don't really want to sell marketers their info. Well, more correctly, consumers don't feel the love.

In a less scientific study, being my wallet. I put all the points/loyalty cards I have on one side and moved over the ones I've used recently to the other. And really I've only moved about 3. One of which didn't get me any deals, points to redeem or preferred whatevers.  

the grinch who sold christmas

I recently wondered why the heck pimento was so popular in the 50’s and 60’s and a friend’s mother was kind enough to explain that really, it was so nice to have some colour to add to dishes. Remembering, of course, that it’s not that long ago that produce was bought when it was in season and then offered canned or frozen for the rest of the year - well you could buy something called a tomato out of season, but mostly it was a knotty, green, tasteless round thing that was called a ‘tomato’.

Fast forward to about a month ago. Back to school promotions started showing up at my local grocery and drugstore chains (incidentally owned by the same company now). Being neither a child or a parent I was still shocked. Sort of. I did a quick calculation. We were about 8 weeks out from the start of school. Back in my retail days you calculated about a 6 week start to the next big ‘holiday’ event so this sort of made sense. On the proverbial other hand, what kid wants to be reminded of school when vacation is only half way through!

While ranting about this on social media someone pointed out to me that Costco had Christmas out at that time too. Calculating again I pointed out that technically Costco is a wholesaler catering to retailers, so having Christmas gear out in July sort of made sense. Yes it seemed out of place, but for all those who remember the annoying reminder of the ‘Days until Christmas’ sign along the Don Valley Parkway in Toronto all those years; Christmas was always coming.

‘Life moves pretty fast’ and in a consumer driven market, the chase is always on to the next season. But start backing it up, to buyers, manufacturers, designers, colour specialists and really, they’re working in terms of 3 to 4 years ahead, so your 6 to 8 weeks is just the final piece of a very long chain that leads to you picking out that particular tomato red sweater for your bestie this Christmas.

At this point I’m pretty stoked that I managed to work a partial Ferris Bueller quote into a post. I also spent some time trying to track down an image of the old Days to Christmas sign on the DVP and fell into a vortex of old Eaton’s catalogue images and only just came back up for air.

Consumerism requires that we shop when the goods are available, but they’ve also taught us there’s a very slim yet attractive period of the end of season sale and the then not for the faint of heart end of season clearance. But if you leave it too long you’re just plain out of luck. Take it from me - the year my coat zipper busted in February was the year I learned to layer. Now like a good Canadian I didn’t have just one winter coat, but still. And I do know how to sew, so if I was really stuck. Okay, my point was, it’s tough finding a winter coat in February because we’re already into prime spring selling and we don’t wear winter coats in spring. Except maybe in most parts of Canada. Because, after all, all this is based on some sort of completely idealized image of season’s and needs. Now back to the catalogues. Which if they are to be believed - that Christmas of 1908 was one dark holiday.

This is not yer traditional red jolly Santa now is it?

I can't find a single image of the old Countdown to Christmas Sign on the DVP, but the bra page of old catalogues, no problem.

the oh boys of summer

I’m not the biggest fan of children. They require constant supervision, they stink, often they’re unable to deal with their own excrement but occasionally they’re fun. For 20 minutes or so. OK, I might be exaggerating. I’d say I’m more indifferent to children. But when I read articles like this, I’m suddenly an advocate.

Living in a city means noise. Cars, businesses, large vehicles, sirens, parades, the occasional party the spills into the streets because major event has happened, like winning a World Series game. But urban living means convenience, selection and people. It also means compromise. The more densely populated a city the greater the need for politeness, and the big problem with a city like Toronto is that we’re just not dense enough to not act stupidly from time to time.

I grew up on a street in transition. Of the 40 odd houses on our little stretch of street, there were 5 kids. Four of us hung out together for several years. We played ‘Star Wars’ (a sort of intergalactic yelling and hitting each other with sticks), we rode bikes, roller skates (back in the metal wheels days), skateboards and other noisy things with wheels, we yelled for no good reason and no one ever complained we made noise. Looking back it really seemed like we were the ipso facto grandchildren of the street.

Also, we always had access to freezies! Beat that.

Going back to Mr. Noisy Complaints Neighbour; why can’t kids be kids? I get it. Noise travels differently over water, But. If you’re that noise sensitive there is a place where you can exist almost silently. It’s called the country.

I live near a hospital, which does mean sirens. But it also means an emergency ward within walking distance. A couple times a week a refrigerator truck sits outside my window to deliver goods to the local convenience stores. Yes they’re loud but having not 1 but 2 convenience stores steps outside my house are worth so much more than complaining. But who do you think delivers this stuff? It’s not delivered by fairies.

I’m with the kids on this one. Summer is short. Yelling is fun. And if we’d had access to a backyard pool as kids, we would have been in there until we were pruney and mostly made of chlorine. Screaming and hitting each other with sticks all the live long day.

fasten your coat tails, it’s going to be a bumpy night

Petitions. Sigh. If you’re at all on social media, you’ve seen these. So much so that the other day I jokingly suggested I was starting a petition to stop stupid petitions. Like the ‘Say no to Kanye’ petition started, and ultimately failing, in protest to the scheduling of Kanye West in the closing ceremony of the recent Pan Am games. I’m not a Kanye West fan. I don’t care about Kanye. But if you want to make your point. Don’t go. It’s a version of voting with your dollars, but nothing sends a message better than no one showing up for something.

On the coat tails of the ol’ petition is the newest cousin, the ‘by paying attention to cause A you must not care about cause B’ stance. The most recent of which was the head shake inducing ‘if you care about Cecil the Lion, you don’t care about Black Lives Matter’. Let’s back up a second. To me these are both interesting situations, complex and layered, beyond that 140 character limit of a Tweet. But, again, from my perspective, completely different things. Yes I have feelings about hunting for sport. Yes I think there’s a huge issue in the US and Canada wherein people are not treated equally. But having feelings about one does not negate my feelings about the other. Having said all that I now have feelings about riding the coat tails of one issue to bring attention to the other. And they’re not so positive.

The thrill of social media is that, if you want to, you can express any old opinion you want. However trolls thrive in anonymity so post-er beware. And then there’s the situation where you don’t want to insult friends or family because you have such polar views about a particular issue. As in I know a lot of non-conservatives holding their tongues over the ‘genius’ of a particular loud mouthed Presidential contender just south of the border. On the flip side, perhaps there’s a way to respond opposing views in a tactful, thoughtful manner which is, fortunately, the more common reaction in my particular social circle. That and the always useful; to completely ignore the post and instead spend time on videos of bears, cats and/or goats doing ridiculously cute things.

It’s a short post this time. I don’t really have a conclusion, but then again, I probably won’t sign your particular petition. Opting instead to choose my words carefully. 

P.S. Apologies about the bears video, it's a fantastic time sucker.

#sidebar - amazingly odd marketing - this week - kfc

I see so many weirdly odd marketing slash promotions, to which, generally, I am not the target audience and I always want to share, and often do to my inner circle, but let's try that here.

Wow, world's longest run on sentence.

Let's present sidebar. Currently KFC is handing out a limited edition container that also, wait for it, will also take Polaroid pictures, which somehow will transmit your lip smacking good time back to some landing page. Ignoring all the issues of not letting people opt out. Polaroids! For those born after 1990, it was an instant printing technology for photographs before we all had a camera in our pocket all the time.

Also, how does KFC stay in business. Probably the same way Taco Bell does. Because drunk people.

state of the uhf or how i accidentally started watching commercials again and it’s bad.

The off-shoot of having cord cut my cable, studied advertising and watching social media sweep up and encompass just about all existing models of ‘traditional’ media makes one, well me, hyper aware of what might be going on. During a recent online discussion with someone I know mostly through online discussions, we discussed that by and large, the traditional television advertising model hadn’t changed in over 70 years – although, in my opinion, we have two more generations to get through before the demand for change will eventually have to be met. Although in a weird twist, the modern product placement within TV shows reminds me of the early days of show sponsorship, so are we coming full circle?

However, off on a side bar, I’m all up to date with what my options for step-in bathtubs, stair hoists and reverse mortgages (for the house I was never able to afford) are! But, back on point, our discussion turned to how to determine the efficacy of popular social campaigns. Citing the Dear Kitten campaign by Purina, which I think is rather entertaining and did share on social media, but did it compel me to switch my cat to their food, well no. So how do we determine if this campaign was successful? I don’t actually know. The time tested success factor would come down to cold hard cash but is product recognition and a sense of community now more important? Again, I don’t actually know.

Any woman who wears make up knows there’s a new mascara introduced every week of a calendar year. One common thread through all mascara advertising - which is basically lifestyle advertising, because, really, it’s dirt to put on your lashes – is that the ideal achievement is a smooth, plump, lengthening clean lash, which if you want to look like the girl in the ad, means time consuming and expensive lash extensions. Maybelline’s new Chaos mascara eschews all that and suggests that theirs is the only mascara that will give you that clumpy, smudgy, mussed up look you didn’t know you were supposed to want. My current theory is that they have a warehouse full of the stuff and found it didn’t do so well in the test market tests - and if that’s the case, kudos to their marketing team. Also works on your boyfriend.

Swiss Chalet has, over the years, and mostly unsuccessfully, tried to expand their menu and thereby their customer base. In my personal opinion this has been a failing prospect. Why not embrace and do the thing you’re good at; consistently prepared rotisserie chicken with a potato product side, and that salty, addictive ‘industrial gravy’ that we call dipping sauce. The latest campaign centres around chicken wings, which oddly, Swiss Chalet is not very good at, and trying to make ‘the Chalet’ as cool as your local pub. And whenever I see the product shot of two men digging into their plate of wings, branded beer glasses in clear sight, I think those guys look whipped (and then I giggle.) Let’s face it, dudes are gonna go get wings and beers and they’re gonna do it at the local pub, or some chain that specializes in keeping sports on multiple screens, all the time. Not at Swiss Chalet.

Insert-car-manufacturer-here ad for getting Millennial’s into cars.  Millennial’s are not getting their driver’s license in record numbers, and don’t buy cars, or so do way less than previous generations. Also Millennial’s don’t watch TV!

Want to know where to get an overpriced payday loan? No amount of fuzzy mascot or purposely homemade looking ad will stop that fact that these people are charging you about 60% interest, and apparently not spending any more than they have to on the advertising budget.

The Fonz selling reverse mortgages. Just writing that makes me feel old. And I’m not even in the target demographic.

And finally, you heard it from the horse’s mouth. They may have cleaned up the Trivago guy, but he’s still sorta creepy. Even clean shaven and in a suit, but it might be the poor taste joke about getting ‘Lucky’ in a room.

see you at 7

Before there was texting and constant communication, making plans to meet was a bit more difficult and a lot less likely to end in no-shows. Before texts and constant communication, you met your friends when and where you said you would because you had no way to let them know you wouldn’t be arriving and not arriving made you an ass.

(Yes we had extenuating circumstances back then, but they were real, so they were rare.)

It’s amazing how quickly we forget the things that used to be day to day when their replacements arrive. We acclimate so well that we often forget what needed to happen before the latest tool or method replaces our old ones. And as much as I find modern communication amazing, I did get a kick out of this particular tidbit of social etiquette. In the same moment I was taken aback that someone had to write it down in a book because really, we should know this.

Be a good friend.  Just say Yes.  Or No.  (from Adulting)

To be fair it did make perfect sense when the MP3 player eclipsed the discman. I mean that thing sucked down disposable batteries, required either listening to the same CD over and over or trying to figure out how to carry a selection and it was kinda big – certainly didn’t fit in any pocket I have.

I recently read an article on the demise of pantyhose, which you might not know, specifically the flesh toned variety. They gained popularity pre World War 2, after a shift in foundation garment use and a rise in hemlines, and they really gained popularity after World War 2 because during the war all fabric supplies where used to make parachutes and the women were out of luck. Even my hippie-esque parents insisted that there were certain situations where hose were needed and tights wouldn’t do it. I even had a job in my 20’s that required hose as part of my uniform, and if I think hard about it, it was rather annoying as they required a blue hue that was not available at a low cost. Yes I didn’t have to buy clothes but did have a $20 a week pantyhose requirement, back when minimum wage was much more minimum. Having eschewed them since, I really didn’t notice that most department stores have slowly phased out their hosiery sections as styles changed. If the Duchess of Cambridge hadn’t been required to add hosiery to her official ‘look’, would anyone under 30 even know what they were? But 75 years was a good run for a fashion trend that wasn’t always so nice to wear. 

Anecdotally the codpiece had a 75 year run too.

OK, well I found it interesting.

After I read the pantyhose article I started to think about things that used to feel so essential to life that fell out of favour as trend or technology passed and may or may not have met their ultimate end. Records seemed to continue to have a strong solid following, but for the audiophile, there’s a sound quality that can’t be beat. CD’s continue to exist as people continue to insist on physical media but got rid of their record players. I haven’t seen a cassette in years. Well other than a handful I kept mostly for nostalgic reasons, most of which are homemade mixed tapes. Which I guess where replaced by playlists. But how do you give the person you’re crushing on a playlist?

Wristwatches is another one for me. I have three in a box on my dresser, and I’m fairly certain all three have dead batteries in them. In part the disuse was due to a cell phone and in part it was due to my constantly, accidentally leaving my watch on my desk at work because I took it off when it banged on the desk while I was typing. But it freed up my wrist for bracelets and I can always get the time on my phone. Yes the ‘smart’ technology has set their sights on a smart watch next, and since not everyone gave up on the watch, this’ll be a trend to ‘watch’! I don’t really see the point of the smart watch, but I’m in the minority I’m certain. In fact I had a discussion with a friend about this very subject and in her case she wears the same watch as a loved relation and finds it ties her emotionally to that relation whenever she looks at it. So in as much as the technology may be passé there are other, valid, reasons for hanging onto to something.

I still have an alarm clock, because I hate the idea of a phone in the bedroom. I do have a cassette player, but only because it’s part of my stereo. I still use pens because I like to do the suduko and the crossword in the newspaper on the weekend, which yes I still get on Saturdays and Sundays to read with coffee.

And what do we do every time this technology changes. Well for those of us who faithfully changed our music collections from records to cassettes to CD’s, we eventually stopped. Some of us hold yard sales or donate to charity. And the rest of hold onto whatever works for us until our favourite toys stop working. We all evolve at our own pace.

The other tidbit I liked from the same book. Which can also apply.